Picking up right where we left off, Kristina is still upset that Dean played her. And so is everyone else. It’s unfortunate that Dean
was forced by producers decided to act like such a jerk. His chances of being The Bachelor now are nonexistent.
I will say, as much as I’m team Kristina, I think she needs to get her act together. We get it, Dean sucks, but what’s the point of being in Paradise if you’re just going to sit around and cry the whole time? Dean is not going to see this and be like “oh wow, she’s very emotionally unstable, better give it another shot.” Kristina needs to suck it up and either date someone else or just go home.
Guys have the roses this week so it’s time for them to stop pretending they’re interested in any of these girls. They just get to hang out, relax, and talk Instagram strategy with Robby.
Robby: “So, yeah if any of you guys are interested in joining my Rodan + Fields team after this…”
Sarah shows up and sets her sights on Adam. I’m just confused as you are. Raven passive aggressively tells Sarah that it’s okay for her to go on a date with Adam but she would be sooo much better with Ben Z. The rest of the girls take Raven’s cue and agree.
Sarah gives it a chance and chats with Ben Z. He jumps at the opportunity to tell another girl that he has a dog and she’s not feeling it. Sarah ends up picking Adam because she
doesn’t give a fuck about Raven likes him. He accidentally calls her Rachel during his interview and things are off to a great start. Adam has no clue where he is or what he’s doing right now. What are you putting in those drinks, Wells?
Their date is boring and Sarah is irritating AF. Now Adam is in a love triangle with Raven and Sarah. I repeat, Adam has two girls fighting over him.
Wells and Danielle make a deal that they’ll get married if they’re still single
next week in 5 years.
Lacey gets a date card and literally nobody wants to go. It’s actually very sad watching her run around dressed like a 7 year old asking people if they want to go on a date with her as ‘more than friends.’
Lacey: “Do you like me, or do you like me like me? Write your answer on this date card and hand it back to me later.”
She ends up taking Diggy and they go on one of Jorges Tour-ges. Jorge tells them that he was conceived on the beach they’re on and it really sets the mood.
Jorge: “Would you like
to have a threesome some champagne?”
Lacey and Diggy hop around the beach and make out and Lacey thinks she’s finally found the one.
Lacey: “I can’t believe Diggy and I
got engaged are kissing on this beach right now. I am so happy.”
Danielle tells Raven she’s going to leave paradise because she hasn’t made a connection with anyone. She has the opportunity to go work in Africa and she thinks it might be a slightly better use of her time than this.
Dominique shows up and I have no clue who she is. Like, actually no recollection. Was she on The Bachelor or is this one of ABC’s tricks? Diggy is immediately interested in her and in no way tries to hide it. Poor Lacey cannot catch a break. Maybe she shouldn’t have dyed her hair brown? Just a thought.
Lacey: “Wait, is Iggy still here?”
Taylor apparently hates Lacey and is best friends with Dominique so she tries to convince her to go out with Diggy.
Dominique: “Who do you think I should go out with?”
Taylor: “omg, GUESS.”
Dominique: “I don’t know, who is it!?”
Taylor: “I want you to guess who you think I would choose for you.”
Dominique: “Literally just fucking tell me.”
Dominique takes Diggy on the date and he tells her he had no connection with Lacey. Tell that to Jorge, Diggy. Tell that to Jorge.
Lacey to Taylor: “I’m literally so alone nobody cares about me and I have nothing.”
Lacey, I think it might be time to throw in the towel. You tried.
Wells walks Danielle out and just fully makes out with her. I have to admit that it was a very sweet moment but, like, what happens now? Danielle is going to Africa and Wells is still a bartender on Bachelor in Paradise. Best of luck to these two.
I’m not going to recap DeMario’s interview but I just wanted to point out Robby’s jacket. Thank you.